The Mind Of Shakur
From the book "Tupac
Shakur by the editors of VIBE."
have constantly been raised to whether or not Tupac Shakur has
matured after his incarceration several months ago. VIBEonline
conducted an exclusive interview with Tupac to find what realy
is making him tick, and what exactly has him ticked off.
wants, pain. Now I'm dealing with a more military type of philosophy-to
mix the street life with respected, known, and proven military
philosophy. So when I'm rapping and talking that hardcore shit,
at least it'll be from a military mind-set.
about your father-do you have any relationship with him?
my father was dead all my life. After I got shot, I looked up
and there was this nigga that looked just like me. And he was
my father; that's when I found out. We still didn't take no blood
test but the nigga looked just like me and the other nigga's dead,
so now I feel that I'm past the father stage. I do want to know
him and I do know him.
We did talk
and he did visit and help me when I was locked down, but I'm past
that. What I want to do is form a society in which we can raise
ourselves; so we can become our own father figures and the big
homies can become their father figures, and then you grow up,
then it's your turn to be a father figure to another young brother.
That's where I want to start. Nine times out of ten, though, we
would want them to be there, they can't be depended on to de there.
Now, some of the mothers can't be there because they doing their
thing [working]. I can't blame them, they gotta do what they gotta
do. So I think the youth should raise themselves since they got
lofty ideas about what't theirs and their rights, what they should
deserve. Since you can't whup their asses, these motherfuckers
should get out and work at fifteen. I want to be a part of the
generation that builds the groundwork for us to raise each other.
of your VIBE interviews, you mentioned an organization that you
were starting with Mike Tyson. What happened whit that?
Now I'm doing
it with Death Row. I was going to do it myself and I found out
when I was about to be sentenced to jail that there was a spot
called "A Place Called Home." I was about to be sent
to jail for an old gun case that I had. The Judge was like "You
can tell your side of who you are" and the prosecutor gave
this big fat envelope of every time I got arrested and all this
stuff that made me look like a crazed animal.
We got someone
who didn't work for us to write my life's story, talking about
everybody in my family and people that I helped. This lady from
the community center wrote as well. We were planning already to
do this big concert with me and my homeboys to raise money to
have a center in North Central where we can have the "at
risk" kids come to a spot that can call home-where they can
get guidance, tutoring, love, nurturing. We're going to do a spot
of it just being a program with me and Tyson like I planned it,
'cause it's me sitting in the penitentiary thinking, is now moved
into this program called "A Place Called Everybody Home"
that I'm working closely with. There's also a program called "Celebrity
Youth League," whit me, Hammer, Suge, and all these sports
figures each going to sponser a youth group all year in football,
baseball, and basketball. We sponsor the teams, buy the uniforms,
hire the coach, and start our own Little League.
you relax from all this that you're doing?
ways: shopping, driving down Sunset with the top down on any car,
and being with my homeboys. Not necessarily the older homies but
the younger ones. Vibing off of what they're talking about and
what's going on, and dropping whatever I have to drop to them.
Then it's not like I'm doing this shit in vain.
still keep in touch with old friends?
On the whole,
I don't have any friends. Friends come and go; I've lost my trust
factor. I believe I have people who think they're my friend. And
I believe that there are people probably in their heart who are
friends toward me or are friends to me. But they're not my friends,
because what I learned is that fear is stronger than love. So
soon as somebody scaries comes along, they won't be my friend
anymore. I learned that on the floor at Times Square-so I don't
have friends, I have family. You're either my all-the-way family
or just somebody on the outside.
tight with your family?
Yeah, we took
it back to the old school. We got the head of the family, we listen
to the rules and regulations, order and organization. Now we're
a living, breathing family, when before we were dying, dysfunctional
family. We still got problems but now we're learing how to deal
I'm the religion
that to me is the realist religion there is. I try to pray to
God every night unless I pass out. I learned this in jail. I talked
to every God [member of the Five Percent Nation] there was in
jail. I think that if you take one of the "O's" out
of "Good" it's "God," if you add a "D"
to "Evil," it's the "Devil." I think some
cool motherfucker sat down a long time ago and said, Let's figure
out a way to control motherfuckers. That's what they came up with-the
bible. 'Cause if God wrote the bible, I'm sure there would have
been a revised copy by now. 'Cause a lot of shit has changed.
I've been looking for this revised copy-I still see that same
old copy that we had from then. I'm not disrespecting anyone's
religion, please forgive me if it comes off that way, I'm just
stating my opinion.
tells us that all these people did this because they suffered
so much, that's what makes them special people. I got shot five
times and I got crucified in the media, And I walked through with
the thorns on, and I had shit thrown on me, and I had the word
thief at the top; I told that nigga, "I'll be back for you.
Trust me, it's not supposed to be going down, I'll will be back."
I'm not saying I'm Jesus, but I'm saying we go through that type
of things every day. We don't part the Red Sea, but we walk through
the 'hood without getting shot. We don't turn water to wine, but
we turn dope fiends and dope heads into productive citizens of
society. We turn words into money-what greater gift can there
be? So I believe God blesses us, I believe God blesses those that
hustle. Those that use their minds and those that averall are
righteous. I believe that everything you do bad comes back to
you. So everything that I do that's bad, I'm going to suffer for
it. But in my heart, I believe what I'm doing in my heart is right.
So I feel like I'm going to heaven.
I think heaven
is just when you sleep, you sleep with a good concience-you don't
have nightmares. Hell is when you sleep, the last things you see
is all the fucked-up things you did in your life and you just
see it over and over again, 'cause bullets burn. There's people
that got burned in fires, does that mean they went to hell already?
All that is here. What do you got there that we ain't seen here?
What, we're gonna walk around aimlessly like zombies? That's here!
You ain't been on the streets lately? Heaven now, look! [he gestures
to his plush apartment.] We're sitting up here in the living room,
big-screen TV-this is heaven, for a moment. Hell is jail-I seen
that one. Trust me, this is what's real. And all that other shit
is to control you.
If the churches
took half the money that they was making and gave it back to the
community, we'd be all right. If they took half the buildings
that they use to "praise God" and gave it to motherfuckers
who need God, we'd be all right. Have you seen some of these got-damn
churches lately? There's homeless people out here. Why ain't God
lettin' them stay here? Why these niggas got gold ceilings and
shit? Why God need gold ceilings to talk to me? Why does God need
colored windows to talk to me? Why God can't come here I'm at
where he sent me? If God wanted to talk to me in a pretty spot
like that, why the hell he send me here then? That makes ghetto
kids not believe in God. Why?
wrong religion-I believe in God, I believe God puts us wherever
we wants to be at. That didn't make sense that God would put us
in the ghetto. That means he wants us to work hard to get up out
of here. That means he's testing us even more. That makes sense
that if you're good in your heart, you're closer to God, but if
you're evil, then you're closer to the devil; that makes sense!
I see that everyday all that other spooky shit, don't make sense.
I don't even believe, I'm not dissin' them, but I don't believe
in the brothers, I've been in jail with 'em and having conversations
with brothers; "I'm God, I'm God." You God, open the
gate for me. You know how far the sun is and how far the moon
is, how the hell do I pop this fuckin' gate? And get me free and
up outta here. Then I'll be a Five Percenter for life.
of woman would it take to settle you down?
A very, very
strong woman. One who's more in love with me because I could be
more in love with her than she is. Every time I fall in love with
a woman, I don't fall in love whit the woman she is, I fall in
love with the woman she could be. I haven't found a woman yet
that met my standards. And I'm sure I don't fit up to everyone's
standards. But I heaven't found yet, but I found one that I think
has the potential to be the rawest woman in the world.
I feel like
it's natural for a man, especially being black, to feel like he's
the king and he's looking for his queen. That's where I'm at right
now. You can't be a king until you've made yourself, until you've
done something. And I've accomplished my goals that made me a
man. Now I set out goals to make me a king. Not a king of anyone
else but me. Nobody else is under my rule but me. I made myself
into a king, now I need a queen to be happy so I can be a teacher
and a father. I can't be that until I find a queen-so I'm stuck
A lot of
youre East Coast fans feel like your new allegiance to the West
Coast is a disloyalty to the East.
much nonsense. Poppycock! (He laughs.) It's not a new allegiance
to the West Coast, I've been on the West Coast all this time.
Some people, not all, some people on the East Coast are on theire
dicks so hard, they never heard me say that I'm living on the
West Coast. It's just by me keeping it real, I always said where
I come from. I always gave New York their props. On Me Against
the World, I took a whole song to give it up. So now on the next
albuw, when I wanna give it up, for my home, where I'm at, everybody
got a problem. Why don't they have a problem with Biggie saying
"Brooklyn in the house" every fucking show he do? They
just did a Sprite commercial with "The Bridge" and KRS,
why isn't it hip hop when I do it?
else can have a beef within the music, talk about differences
and it's OK. It's music, it's hip hop, it's groundbreaking. When
I do it, it's war. That's all I'm doing. All I'm doing is saying
that I'm tired of you talking about where you're from. If that's
what we're gonna do now. We was doing it like hip hop was one
nation. I have proof to say what I was doing-I've done more for
the East Coast than the East Coast did. I put more guns in East
Coast niggas' hands then East Coast niggas did when they came
out here. I put them niggas on to more weed gates and weed spots
and safe havens and safe spots than East Coast did. I put more
rappers on than they did. I gave Biggie his first Shows! I was
that bridge that niggas used to walk on to get over here. I explained
it, I was the one that told you. I'm why all these niggas are
running around with a gangbanger on their payroll now.
still a beef going on between you and Biggie?
never a beef, only a difference of opinion. My homeboy Suge gave
me the best advice that I could ever get from anybody. When people
ask him if he's beefing with Bad Boy and Puffy, he's says it's
like me going to the playground to pick on little kids. That's
like me being mad at my little brother 'cause he's getting cash
now. I'm not mad at that, I'm just mad at my little brother when
he don't respect me, I'ma spank that ass. I don't give a fuck
how rich you got on the block, I'm your big brother. I'ma break
your big ass down. That's my only point.
I feel as
though he got out of hand. He got seduced by the power-not because
he's an evil person, but because money is evil if it's not handled
right. If you lose your composure, you could do anything. Fear
got stronger than love and niggas did things that they weren't
really supposed to do. They know in their hearts that's why they're
in hell now. They can't sleep. That's why they're telling all
the reporters and all the people "Why they doing this? They
fucked up hip hop, blah, blah, blah." 'Cause they in hell.
They can't make money, they can't go anywhere, they can't look
at themselves, 'cause they know the prodigal son has returned.
I'm alive; the ghost is walking around.
who thinks that I disrespected, I love my East Coast fans. I'm
from there. I'm eating NewYork pizza, I drive New York jeeps,
but I'm saying let's keep it real for a second. If you're half
the lover of music that you are, go back and study. Study how
"Party and Bullshit" was me before I met Biggie. You
don't hear my style in his raps. Study how after I met Biggie,
Ready to Die comes out and his whole style changed. Study why
I would be mad when half of the major New York rappers or their
managers, or their agents, or their somebody was there when I
got shot-and nobody couldn't give me no information. Just study
that. Study how when Wu-tang got their chain snatched at six-six-deuce,
I not only found who did it but gave them the message that if
they wanted to see the niggas that did it, they could see them.
Man to man, just you and them-no guns, no nothing if you feel
like that. That's all I ask for. If you're going to act like a
gangster or a G or a king of New York, I'ma expect that. And when
you don't come through, then I'm going to want to crush your empire.
And that's what it's time for.